So is he/she a "sociopath", "psychopath" or do they have "Anti Social Personality Disorder" (ASPD)? You pick, because basically, they're the same thing, particularly since few are ever officially diagnosed.
Calling someone a "Psychopath" tends to instill undue terror of those with this condition. This term usually instills thoughts of psychotic serial killers and so in the 1930's, authorities changed the term to sociopath.
"Sociopath" still carries weight and forewarns those who could be victimized, for even if the terror they inflict is merely emotional, it is terrorizing none-the-less. Once again, the term became synonymous with serial killers though, so the powers-that-be changed the name of the condition to ASPD.
Not only is the term "Anti Social Personality Disorder" long and ungainly, but it is too light and too benign or innocent sounding to protect the innocents that these people run across. All need to understand the gravity of the condition.
You will find that most people who write about the condition prefer the term sociopath, while those still caught in the midst of the terror lean towards psychopath. I prefer the weight of the name "sociopath" and will use it in my writings.
Somewhere, I heard that there are no degrees of sociopathy, that all are equally dangerous and that the difference between a sociopath and a psychopath is merely opportunity. Chilling.
In my experience, there are "higher functioning" sociopaths that maintain jobs and at least the facade of a marriage and family.
My son would be an example of a "lower functioning" sociopath. He couch surfs when not incarcerated, because he can't hold onto a job for long, and therefore a place to live. He simply cannot hold onto any relationship for long due to his inability to remain faithful and non-violent. He abuses substances and lives a life of crime.
Call it what you want, but learn and protect yourself. If you have anything else to add that would help others protect themselves and move on, please share.
The most important thing to remember once you realize there is a sociopath in your life is to remember they will do and say anything to get what they want. Don't believe them. Reach into your back pocket and pull out the big red bullshit card from the get-go and stick to it!
ReplyDeleteAlthough you worded that a little harsher than I would like, I must agree whole-heartedly. The trouble is, most of us have to be burned time and time and time again before we learn that lesson.
ReplyDeleteIt goes against my very nature not to give people the benefit of the doubt, but I've learned that once someone has proven themselves a sociopath, we must assume that everything they say and do is a falsehood.
Though I prefer the term boloney, I must remember that they themselves know they are b-s-ing me and are taking great delight in the game. To know that is to protect oneself and one's loved ones.
thank you for these articles living with a sociopath is hard your love and kindness and generosity are reciprocated with lies and hate and anger lies and distortion campain's the thing is that they can fake being " normal " enough to gain entry into a unsuspecting persons life, one trait you brought up is the lies , the nonstop lying seems pathological , they do lie so much and like you mentioned about things that don't matter but as well about things that do- take them to lunch and be kind to them , your reward they are lying about you to someone to get them to be angry at you and when the person believes their lie , they are happy and smiling while you are reeling in the emotional feeling from being falsely accused this lack of conscious is what is chilling and lying it seems in order to get other people to feel sorry for them , seeking pity is for sure a big trait I felt so guilty because I ended up feeling so angry and prayed to God to forgive me for my bad feelings. I cant thank you enough for this site and your articles to inform people . thank you
ReplyDeleteI think the most important thing is to get educated to empower your self with knowledge.At first it is shocking to encounter a person that lies and lacks the normal empathy levels and conscious but getting educated on the disorder really helps you to put things in perspective , it also help's empower you to take care of your self in the situation/keeping your self safe physically , emotionally when dealing with a sociopath I was surprised to learn that statistics show that one in ten people are sociopaths , Without conscious regard for the rights , feelings of others these people end up wreaking havoc on many peoples lives , not all of them commit crimes that they could go to jail for , but they all wreak havoc on people's lives and can end up causing a lot of emotional damages and pain for those close to them
ReplyDeleteThank you, thank you! You obviously speak from experience. It is an unfortunate club to be a member of, but you get it and I believe that once we have survived the storm, we have an obligation to help others who are still in the midst of it, just the same as we'd jump in and help the shell-shocked survivors of a tornado.
ReplyDeleteYes not dacrazy1 , I agree that helping others is very important because not only is there a lot of shame involved in dealing with someone close to you who is a sociopath , there is a whole lot of pain in the aftermath of that storm you speak of. I thank you for this site as I feel it is a big help to have this information out in the open to reach others who may be suffering because not always do they know that they are involved in a relationshp with a sociopath . I think it helps to know also that you are not alone and not the only one dealing with such a person and also as your name says to help you realize you are Not the crazy one. Sociopaths do have "crazy making behavior " and can leave you questioning your own sanity at times. Again thank you for this site.
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