I am a wife and a mother of five and I am anonymous.
Why anonymous?
Our adult son is a sociopath and has at times, made our lives a living hell.
I am in no way blind to the danger he presents to this family and others, even from prison.
My goal is to share my experiences and insights in hopes that they will help you and in hopes that you will share with me and help me through the on-going process of surviving and thriving despite a sociopath.
Hi.. With you being the mother of a sociopath i wondered if you could help ease my mind in relation to my experience. My ex partner (sociopath) went on the run (underground) from the police when they got involved after my partner subjected me to many acts of extreme abuse in 2006.
ReplyDeleteHis parents wont help, speak or assist the police in anyway. They claim that they've no idea where he is & dont want to get involved in his destruction.
This confuses me because parents love unconditionally so i believe they must know where he is. Its been many years now since he went on the run so surly he'll have been intouch with his parents.
Based on your experience do you think his parents will be aware that he is a sociopath or a least suspect that he is?
I ask because im desperate to obtain closure, ive never got my much deserved justice & i dont doubt whilst on the run he continues to inflict his abuse & destruction onto others. & on top of that i cant rule out that he may return to abuse me further. After all he did say that if i ever involve dthe police i would one day be found in a pool of blood.
I feel the only way i can move on is to try & get the answers to some unanswered questions.
I would really appreciate your opinion.. Thanks x
Oh, how I wish I had answers for you!
ReplyDeleteIf his parents do recognize him as a sociopath, then perhaps they really have cut all ties with him and are ignorant to his whereabouts. Their unwillingness to talk to the police may even be due to fear of retribution.
In my experience though, it is more than likely that they are in denial. I am endless ly frustrated with people who refuses to see the truth and not only remain victims, but continue to aid and abet the sociopath.
If you had children with your ex, then I would not allow those grandparents unsupervised visits as long as they remain in denial. They may expose the children to the ex who would do significant damage. Not only would they be in danger of being kidnapped, but he would most likely work endlessly to poison their minds against you.
You have already done so well in recognizing his illness and realizing that you are not the crazy one. That is the first step in protecting your future.
I'll pray that you find the next step so that you can move on with your life. I'm here to "talk" anytime, but I hope that you will also turn to your God for help. He knows us and our hurts and our faults and he loves us unconditionally anyway. He is just waiting for us to turn to him and talk to him.
The Lovefraud Blog has a whole section on healing from a sociopath that I think you will find helpful:
ReplyDeletehttp://www.lovefraud.com/blog/category/healing-from-a-sociopath/
The "no contact" policy discussed at "lovefraud" web site is the best advice. There is no closure w/a sociopath. RUN...don't walk away!!! Let God take care of the rest111
ReplyDeleteThat is a fantastic idea. However, what about court systems? In my state, parental rights are tops and even though my ex has known mental health issues, the courts refuse to recognize them and literally force my children to spend unsupervised time with him. Help! We are living in hell and there is nothing I can do except help them be strong.
ReplyDeleteYou are living a nightmare. I wish I had solutions. That is why I advise young women pregnant by sociopaths to offer the man the opportunity to sign away his rights in exchange for not expecting any form of financial support. They say no contact is the only way to survive, but if it's your own minor child or the mother or father of your minor children, you are caught. As far as I know, your only choice is to make the best of the terrible situation until the children are adults. Try to build yourself a support network of people who do understand and remember that "Peace is not the absence of trouble, but the presence of God".
ReplyDeleteHi I was just browsing one day on KSL and ran across your story I could not believe what I was reading its so familiar my son has had been a problem child since the age 7 we took him in our home h oping to give him a better life and stable home he has been in counseling,therapy and so on things at that ag were pretty bad but at the age of 16 it was horrible he is very manipulative,lies,steals,conartist,takes advantage of people hearts he has not been physical abusive to us as of yet but very mentally abusive to all of his family members obe dat we called the police on him because he was so out of control the police told us that he fits the criteria of a sociapath soi looked up th meaning and there was my son it descibed him to a tee I cannot ever trust him on anything he lies so much and manipulates peolpe to get what he wants and cons them into trusting him because he is just a good liar it is so scary how good he is at lyeing and making people believe him he just turned 18 and I am so glad that we dont have any more responseablity for his actions I know that sounds harsh but he has mentally abused so bad that we are physically worn down I hope they find something for sociapath because they really need the help if they will accept it there is so much more to tell that he has done there could be a book on it.I hope everybody out there tat is dealing with this issue seeks help also because you dont have to put up with the abuse the only thing that was the hardest about getting help was when he was a minor there aint much the police can do. (exhausted)
ReplyDelete